Kerry says:

Dear Sail Away,

Would you like to know why she is behaving like that? And would you like to know why you don’t know how to handle it? Are you ready? It’s because you are both 19 YEARS OLD. You’re both kids and should not even consider being married at this age! Besides, there are already red flags that she is clearly a control freak. If you are having these kinds of conflicts already, imagine spending spend the next 70 years with this person!

Jacqueline says:

Dear Don’t be Silent,

I’m curious as to why, at the ripe age of 19, you feel you must rush out and get married….so I am in complete cahoots with Kerry! (That’s the second time in one column that we agree – hmmmmm….)

But to answer your question, you claim she “takes over things”. Yes, you do need to address this -- if you think it is bad now it will get worse after you are married. If she starts to pick out your clothes again, remind her you are not her kid, but the man she is marrying and you are capable of picking out your own clothing. Let her know that although you appreciate her kindness, when you get married YOU WILL BOTH select the furniture, the house and the car. If she just laughs at you as if you’re a fool, as you say, then tell her she really doesn’t know the man whom she is about to marry -- because this man ain’t going to put up with that. You might be surprised – she might very well welcome your assertiveness.